I do apologize for the delay.
It occurred to me during my hiatus of writing that this blog has served its purpose. I wasn't even really sure it had a purpose, but whatever it was... well, I think it is done. But more on that later.
It also occurred to me how everything is so cyclical. I think that we humans are creatures made up of circles, spinning around, and every revolution is a slightly different iteration of last time. I know I'm talking rather metaphorically. All I mean to say is that everything in life circles back on itself. Maybe this is so we are reminded of times past, or maybe so that we have some sort of structure that we count on. Our brains are wired by our hypothalamus to expect cycles. I know some people anticipate the change in season like a religion. They post on facebook or twitter or instagram, first snow, first spring thunderstorm, first pumpkin spice latte...
Ah.. Seasons. Seasons have such a unique feeling to them. For me, there is always a soundtrack and a smell to each season. In the summer, the smell of mugginess, hot asphalt, and grass accompany the soundtrack of pop punk and the occasional top 40 hit. Fall brings a brisk smell, almost like laundry done with scentless detergent. Jack's Mannequin provides the soundtrack. Winter smells like dry and dust to me, accompanied by alternative rock. In the spring, I can't smell anything on account of my allergies, but I listen to more popular music during this time.
I've been told a few times that my sense of smell is rather acute. It's hard to say though, because the sense of smell is not given much importance in comparison to the other senses. From an evolutionary standpoint, the sense of smell is almost trivial. That is to say, a creature with an impaired sense of vision or feeling is far more stunted in terms of survival than one that cannot smell, at least for humans.
I guess all this thinking about cycles has also got me thinking about doldrums and exciting periods of time in our lives. Sometimes it gets me down to be in the doldrums, you know? But it is only just a cycle. I think it is pretty natural. Summer will come again. Fall too, and then winter. I think that the realization that we are bound to oscillating moods is rather uplifting: this too will pass. Joy and peace will come again. Maybe not now or tomorrow, but sometime they will. It also makes things seem more important, because you might be here again. So take some notes. Get comfortable. Next time around you'll be better.
Maybe, possibly, you have been through all those things you have been through just to get to here.
I suppose this might be terribly obvious to any reader who has already considered the obvious fact that our feelings are not static, but it is just what I have been thinking recently.
But, as I said, this blog has served it's purpose. I think I started it to externalize what I believe, but I don't think I like that anymore. I'll keep writing, but it will be a new blog, and the purpose of that blog will be far more mundane: I'll write about what happens. I think I will enjoy chronicling the mundane and commonplace.
Maybe a season will come and I will return here.
What has been will be again,
what has been done will be done again;
there is nothing new under the sun.