9.26.2011

Public/Private

I don't like to do good things in public.

I know Jesus says we should pray and do good works in private, but I unfortunately don't think my reason is the same as Jesus'. I should think that Jesus said this so it doesn't go to our heads and so that he receives the glory and because his love is always focused on others and not ourselves.

But for me, I like to do them privately because I know who I am, and I don't want you to get confused about who I am. I don't want to do them publicly and have people think I'm a saint, because I'm not.

I think this is why I like to serve with people that know me. They know who I really am, and that I've got a heart of pride and I'm as lazy as a sloth, so it's a really big deal when I overcome those things do what's right. I don't mind them seeing me doing the right thing because I think they've got an accurate picture of me, and I'm as human as can be.

But our gift is unfathomable grace. It is much too deep for me to comprehend, but perhaps just within my faith to believe.

God's picture of me is both accurate and somehow faultless at the same time.

I guess that would make me a saint.

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